If you tell someone you’re scared of something, the main response you’ll get is, ‘Just face your fears!’
However, facing fears isn’t always easy to do, and in some cases, it doesn’t help you to get over them either. The idea of exposing yourself to your fears and facing them in the first place can really fill you with anxiety and worry, and actually trying to do a certain thing that you’re afraid of can make you feel even worse.
Why do we have fears in the first place?
There are several reasons why we have fears. One of the main factors is our childhood and upbringing – if our parents were scared of dogs, we are more likely to be scared of dogs and other animals. Growing up listening to adults and other role models talking about a certain thing as being very scary and worrying will influence our minds and cause us to think the same.
What if the fear isn’t even justified?
You might have fears that you believe are totally irrational and absurd, but each of us are individuals and one person can be scared of something which another person finds totally normal (or even enjoys!). For example, the fear of heights is a common one with many people around the world, but some people purposely put themselves in situations where they are on top of very tall buildings or other heights. If it’s a fear to you, it is very much justified and you shouldn’t feel like you cannot talk about it or discuss it.
Can facing your fears actually help?
It takes a lot of courage to face your fears, but yes, exposing yourself to the things you are afraid of can help you to overcome that particular fear. The more you do something and realise that it works out okay for you and you come out the other end unharmed, the less you will fear it. It isn’t always harm that we fear either – you might be worried about being ridiculed by people if you take part in a public speech or event. Once you do it and realise that people are supportive and encouraging to you, you will feel better about doing it again and again. It might take time before you are able to face your fears and try to overcome them by exposing yourself to them, but be patient with yourself and don’t be afraid to try again.
